Episode # 39 – Why should we have the basic “TRUST” for others? Vidura explains!!!

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In the previous episode we had witnessed Vidura’s beautiful explanation about how significant is “friendship” in our daily lives and how we’ve to carefully nurture friendship with the right company. We witnessed the demerits of bad friendship with the example of Karna in the Mahabhaarata, wherein even though Karna was a good person by heart, he had to be killed along with Duryodhana because of his bad companionship. Moreover, one of the main reasons why Lord Krishna had to take Arjuna’s side during the final war against Karna was that, he failed to stop Duryodhana from insulting Draupathi (Wife of the Paandavas) in the courtroom during the infamous episode of the ludo game. Since Karna had committed one of the biggest sins of life, Lord Krishna had no other option but to destroy him. This episode explains the significance of “good companionship” as per the proverb, “A friend in need is a friend indeed”. This means that, a friend is not a person who is there around us just to share funny moments and laughter. He/she should be a person who would be the first one to criticize our wrongdoings at the right time and correct us to the path of Dharma. This is where the “Friend in need” comes to picture. Rather, if we are getting carried away with the wrong companionship, we would undoubtedly fall into the “Mooda” category!

Now moving on to the next characteristic of a “Mooda” or a “Fool”, Vidura explains,

“Samsaara yathi krithyaani sarvatra vichikitsyathe!!”

Here Vidura explains the next characteristic called as “Doubting”. Now what is this doubting? Why is this so significant for us? Let us see today.

Basically, our day-to-day lives run somewhat smoothly only based on “confidence” or “belief” or “trust”. For instance, when we drive a car on a highway at a speed of 120 kilometers per hour, we are confidently driving at such high speeds only with the belief that the car can be stopped at will when we apply the brake. It is only with this belief or trust in the brake that we drive at such high speeds, isn’t it? Similarly in life, we progress forward each day only with a set of beliefs. For instance, both the husband and wife in the present day go out for work in big companies wherein there are thousands of other employees working along with us. It is only with the belief that neither the husband of the wife would not fall into the wrong companionship with an outsider, that both of them set out to work every day.

But what is happening nowadays? Whatever maybe the aspect, we start doubting everybody around us. That is of course because of the nature of the modern day society around us. Thus, over a period of time, the “trust” factor amongst our family members, peers, etc. have started to decrease. There are innumerable instances wherein people get into illicit relationships, extra-marital affairs, pulling down co-employees due to professional rivalry, backstabbing, theft, robbery, etc. Because of all these issues, the “trust” factor or the “belief” that we have amongst others have started to reduce drastically and in turn, a sense of fear has crept inside us. For instance, even when we’ve to walk on the road for a few meters, we fear what if someone would rob away my wallet or my mobile phone, what if someone would snatch away my chain, etc. Thus, we’ve started to lose trust amongst people around us even for basic things in life. Moreover, things have started to go to the next level wherein rapes and other heinous crimes have become the order of the day in many places around the world! As human beings, where are we heading? What is happening to our basic moral values of life? This is a shocking state of affairs in the modern day and we need to really ponder about this.

So much for the societal loss of trust – But what happens within our homes as well? The modern generation youth doesn’t like to be asked anything by anybody. Even if parents ask their sons or daughters as to why are they coming home late after 11 PM at night, the immediate reply that comes from them is that, “Oh! Are you questioning my integrity and privacy?”

Thus the underlying lesson for all of us is that, we need to develop a certain amount of basic trust amongst others around us. Of course we might ask the counter question that what if we get cheated due to our trust. Yes, I agree. But however, we need to develop atleast a certain level of trust with everybody around us. The question of being careful and not getting cheated arises when the other person misuses our trust. Till that point it is always necessary that we should not constantly doubt others for anything and everything. That would severely backfire at us.

Of course in the modern day scenario, I would not say that “doubts” shouldn’t be there. But atleast we should make a conscious effort not to display our doubts obviously amongst others, unless and until we really have the solid evidence of their misbehavior or wrongdoings. Thus we should realize that having doubts is not wrong, but at the same time, we should have a little bit of basic trust amongst people around us. Doubts can be displayed only when there are significant signs of wrongdoing.

Thus let us ponder about this important point for today and introspect within us. Let us not doubt others unwantedly unless it is extremely required. By that way, let us build a basic trust and belief within ourselves that things would go on smoothly in our lives. That would give us the happiness within us. We shall wait for the next episode to witness the next characteristic of a “Mooda”. Stay tuned! 🙂

Published by Dr. Jeayaram

Holds a PhD in Management Psychology from Universite Paris Saclay, Paris, France. Also an Asst. Professor of Human Resources management at Amrita Vishwa Vidyapeetham in Kerala, India. A professional South Indian classical musician (singer) performing concerts. Through this blog, I'm trying to bring out the richness of Indian culture & values and I request your support and feedbacks in making this humble effort a success!!

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