Episode # 567 – “There should be a common goal between the couple for a successful relationship” – Draupati explains!!!

In the previous episode, we had witnessed the applicability of Draupati’s words in our everyday life and we had discussed how we’re deviating from the “Dharma” which Draupati is mentioning here. Readers can recall that Draupati had spoken about cleanliness and transparency as main aspects of “Dharma” as she goes on to explain her secret behind a successful relationship with her husbands. Moving on further from here, Draupati continues to explain a few more things to Satyabhama. She says thus, “Oh Satyabhama! For a relationship to be successful, there should be a common goal between the husband and a wife! Only if there is some commonality in what we’ve to achieve in life, will we have a hold in the relationship. Whereas, as individuals, if we have different personal goals and if they never match with our spouse’s, there is no point in living together. Of course, both the husband and the wife are individual human beings at the end of the day and both can have separate aspirations in their lives. I’m not denying that at all. However, when it comes to making a family and a home for ourselves, our goals should be compatible with each others’. There should be a mutual respect for what each other wants to do in life. If the husband wants to achieve something, the wife has to complement and support him. Similarly, if the wife has a certain set of aspirations, the husband should stand like a pillar behind her, in order to let her pursue her goals. None of them should be a stumbling block for each other, and this will happen only if the goals are compatible and mutually agreeable. The wife should like what the husband is doing, and vice versa. Only if this compatibility is there, will the relationship be successful!” 

This is something which we keep seeing today too – Especially with women working today, this has a lot of relevance. If the wife wants to achieve something, which the husband believes that it would add a lot of value to the family and relationship, definitely any husband would support it. Similar is the case with the wife as well. However, if there is no liking in what the husband does, how can the wife support? Thus, complementarity will arise only if there is a commonality between the goals of both the husband and wife. This is where mutual trust and respect develops between the couple over the long term. 

Moving on thus, Satyabhama asks Draupati back, “Oh Draupati! I agree with all your points! However, tell me one thing – You would have a lot of servants to support you, wouldn’t you? Since you’re a queen, and since you might have a lot of work to do!” For this, Draupati replies back thus, “Oh Satyabhama! You’re right! I’ve got a lot of work every day. Around 6000 Brahmin Pandits and Maharishis come in search of my husband, Yudishtra every passing day. Hence, my “Dharma” is to feed all of them a sumptuous breakfast or lunch or dinner – Depends upon when they come home. I’ll ensure that none of them go back without eating to their satisfaction here. Moreover, I also feed around 9000 animals including horses, elephants, etc. that are around in this forest. However, even as I feed so many people and animals, the treasury box at home will never see a dip. Resources will always be full and this will aid me in serving everybody. Moreover, if Maharishis come, I know which Maharishi likes what type of food items, and accordingly I prepare food for each of them! Thus, when it comes to feeding, I don’t see a difference in anybody. Afterall, all of us are humans, aren’t we? Irrespective of whether he / she is a servant or a Brahmana Rishi, I serve them with the same love and affection. You may check with Yudishtra if I had faltered in my “Dharma” at any cost. I would confidently say that he would say that Draupati hasn’t failed in her “Dharma” even for a single day! This is why Yudishtra loves me a lot. Moreover, when it comes to home maintenance, I know exactly which item is kept where. If Yudishtra or anyone for that matter asks me for something, I will be able to immediately take it and give it to them! Also, I know the names of each and every animal that are around – Including the cows, elephants, etc. I call each of them by their names, and they would immediately respond to my calling! Such is the control I have over all of them, and this is also something that Yudishtra likes a lot about me!”

This accord from Draupati is an eye-opener for all of us and it shows how intelligent Draupati is! We shall discuss the practical implications of Draupati’s points that we can take for our everyday life today, in the next episode! Stay tuned! 🙂 

Published by Dr. Jeayaram

Holds a PhD in Management Psychology from Universite Paris Saclay, Paris, France. Also an Asst. Professor of Human Resources management at Bharatidhasan Institute of Management (BIM) Trichy, India A professional South Indian classical musician (singer) performing concerts. Through this blog, I'm trying to bring out the richness of Indian culture & values and I request your support and feedbacks in making this humble effort a success!!

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