Episode # 312 – “Who can be best friends in this world?” – Vidura’s interesting point of view!!!


In the previous episode we witnessed Vidura giving four beautiful examples on how do we convert our weaknesses and drawbacks into great opportunities for success and growth! He said that firstly, if we’re silent and polite at a time when we’re caught red-handed for some wrongdoing of ours, this might result in reduction of our punishment owing to our good conduct. Secondly, at times our physical strength should also play a role to rescue us if we get entangled into certain kinds of peculiar issues. Thirdly, if we’re going through a situation of extreme anger or frustration, we can divert our mind by chanting our “Mantra”, wherein our mind can get an opportunity to calm itself down. Finally Vidura explains that if our weakness is not being attractive and beautiful in looks, we can always overcome this weakness with our robust value system. Beyond a point in life, physical and external beauty would not matter much for the outside world. The world would hail us only if we have an excellent value system that we build for ourself.

Saying thus, Vidura explains the important message that it is not wrong to have weaknesses in us as human beings. But the main focus here is that we need to take a conscious step to convert that weakness into an opportunity through some means or the other, which we need to figure out for ourselves, using our intellect.

Moving on thus, Vidura explains the next point – Here he talks about sustained friendship with someone. Who can be best friends in this world? Vidura explains thus:

“Yayoshchityenavaaschittham nibrutham nibhrutena vaa!

Samethih pragnyayaah pragnyaa tayoor maithreena jeevathi!!”

Here Vidura explains that, those two people whose intellects and intelligence go together, those two people who share the same kinds of secrets in life, those two people whose thought processes are exactly the same as that of the other would be excellent friends! Thus Vidura says that the match between two people should be impeccable in such a way that two people’s wavelengths of mind are exactly the same in terms of lot of things! This is being proved in today’s studies on human psychology! In Behavioral sciences we infer this as “Chemistry” between two human beings.

Even during a marriage when a boy marries a girl, how can be a great couple or a “Divya-Dhampathi”? Only if both of them can complement each other well with different aspects of life, can they become an excellent couple! For instance, if the boy is an introverted person and the girl is also an introverted person, there would be no communication at all within both of them! Whereas if one of them is extroverted and the other might be somewhat introverted, it can compliment the balance between the two people properly! Thus if one person is somewhere lacking in something and if the other person can balance it out, it would become a perfect match, and can be termed as “Made for each other”!

Nowadays there is a debate raging as to whether a person should marry another person who is from the same profession of work or not! Some people say yes, and some say no! However if for instance, both husband and wife are working in the IT field, and both have office timings of 12 hours a day, how do they balance their work and personal life? They might be earning lumpsum amount of money, but what about their personal happiness and enjoyment together? Hence it is always required that both the husband and wife balance out their time so that they would be able to spend quality time with each other. This is extremely important for every couple in this world.

So the message here from Vidura is that, two people can make “best” friends or “best” couples in this world only if their mind wavelengths match, their thought processes match and their secrets in the form of intimacy would match! So for today let us spare a thought for this important point and we shall expand this point further in the next episode! Stay tuned! 🙂

Published by Dr. Jeayaram

Holds a PhD in Management Psychology from Universite Paris Saclay, Paris, France. Also an Asst. Professor of Human Resources management at Bharatidhasan Institute of Management (BIM) Trichy, India A professional South Indian classical musician (singer) performing concerts. Through this blog, I'm trying to bring out the richness of Indian culture & values and I request your support and feedbacks in making this humble effort a success!!

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