In the previous episode, we had witnessed a very important and an interesting accord from Bhishmachaarya pertaining to the context of “Aapad-Dharma” – Four kinds of “Mithra” (Friendships). This comes at a time when Yudishtra asks an important question as to how to identify whether a person is a true friend to us or not. For this, Bhishmachaarya categorizes friendship into four different types, namely “Sahaartha”, “Bhajamaana”, “Sahajan” and “Krithrima”. While “Sahaartha” means friendship with some kind of expectation at all times, “Bhajamanam” means friendship that occurs due to family bondings of various types (relatives). “Sahajan” indicates those people who are with us through kith and kin – happy and difficult times, and “Krithrima” indicates those people who are opportunistic in nature. With this, Bhishmachaarya explains different types of people who are in connection with us at all times during our lives.
Even in our own context today, we will have people around us who might fall into any of these four categories. There might be many people whom we come across all through our life journey – Both personal and professional. At our workplace we come across several colleagues all through our career tenure, but does everyone stick to us as “Sahaja” (friendship through kith and kin)? The obvious answer is “No”! Only a very few people fall into this category, and those people should be of the same wavelength of mind, thought process, etc., isn’t it? It might be amazing to also introspect that when we are working with an organization for a span of maybe 3 to 4 years, we might have developed extremely close friendships with a few of our colleagues. However, when we move on to another organization for our own career growth and upliftment, many of our so-called “close colleagues” in our previous organization will slowly go out of touch! We might remember them, but we might not have anything to talk / share with them in due course of time, and thus, the friendship slowly vanishes! This is exactly what Bhishmachaarya also says here – There can be no permanent friends / enemies throughout our lives. These are sublime things that keep changing day after day, and we’ve to accept and move on with it.
Moving on further from here, Bhishmachaarya is now adding a fifth dimension to friendship – “Dharmatma” – A person who is an epitome of “Dharma” at all times. We also might have some people like this in our lives – Someone who can appreciate us when we do the right thing, and at the same time, criticize us when we do something wrong. This is a very important category of friendship. Many times we might get carried away by those people who constantly keep appreciating us for everything that we talk and do. We might think that they are our best buddies! But the story isn’t that! A friend should also be able to confront us if we’re deviating from our path of “Dharma”. If this is not happening, there is no point in having a friend, isn’t it? This is what the old English proverb captures beautifully – “A friend in need is a friend indeed!”, and this is exactly what Bhishmachaarya explains here.
Saying this, now Bhishmachaarya goes into the next part of Yudishtra’s question. Readers might remember that Yudishtra had asked earlier that which person should be encouraged up to what level. Bhishmachaarya is providing a beautiful explanation here – “Oh Yudishtra! You should always keep “Mithra” number 1 and 4 (“Sahaartha” and “Krithrima”) at bay! In other words, you should not encourage them beyond a certain point, as they are opportunistic in nature! “Mithra” number 2 and 3 (Bhajamana and Sahajan) can be encouraged more closely, as they will be trusted aides of yours. Whereas, when it comes to “Mithra” number 5 – “Dharmatma”, you should always worship them and keep them with you at all times! This is because these are the people who will guide you in the right path at all times!”
These are beautiful words of explanation from Bhishmachaarya, which requires enormous introspection within our own selves! We shall take this important discussion forward into the next episode as well! Stay tuned! 🙂
The Indian Dharma 